Emax

Hey Daniel,
 
First, major applause for completing something you feel happy enough with to put out there. Second any crtisims should be taken as trying to help. And keep in mind I feel this is better than most the shit that is on the charts right now. But speaking of the charts, maybe you should add some auto-tune effect on your voice. I'm sure you would chart right now. . .
 
What are you going for with the track? What place, what atmosphere do you want me to be in, or what feeling do you have or want to envoke from the song? 
 
Just some thoughts:
 
Structure:
 
I would hold the drum intro to 4 measures assumine 4/4 time signature (16 beats) to establish the rythmn and perhaps bring in the synth bass on the 2nd measure. Next I would layer in one or two of your next tracks over the next 4 measures and bring the vocals in at the start of the 9th measure. The ending around 3:40-3:43 actually would sound really great at the end of your bridge before droping right back into the chorus.
 
Lyrics:
 
It is my feeling that I'm being beat over the head with my "imginary friend". Try to go back an replace imaginary friend with a descriptive smilie or metaphore, or an event that foreshadows your imaginary friend as this cop out or priority in people's life. 
 
Effects:
 
The bass could use some glissandro or a slight susstain to round off the edges just slightly. Also, have you tried raising the bass an octave higher? It sounds really low without the punch and this sometimes occurs on bass samples that are being played too low. Some EQ on the bass could make it fill out a little also, or layer a real bass sound in there.

It made me think of Body Pop and a bit Joy Division so I think it is in line with exactly what you were going for. Keep it up!
 
-patrick


________________________________
From: Daniel Baum <daniel@...>
To: emax@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Fri, February 19, 2010 9:23:53 AM
Subject: [emax] Imaginary Friend - my latest song

  
Hi all,

Here's my latest song:

http://alonetone. com/danielb/ tracks/imaginary -friend

Most of it is Emax II, and there are two parts played on the Roland Jx-8P.

It be very interested to hear what you think of it.

Thanks,

Daniel

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